Fellow travellers, there has been much talk in the media about recent anti carbon tax rallies. One increasingly common angle is that they have been the result of a genuine grass roots movement of working class Aussies angry about Julia Gillard's "lies".

This is obviously not the case. As we all know, the great unloofahed are overwhelmingly shiftless and apathetic. You couldn't rouse them with a cattle prod. All they want to do is stare blankly at their plasma televisions and guzzle McMuffins and McNuggets in their McMansions.

That's why those present at the rallies in Canberra and most recently Sydney were not in any way representative of "mainstream society". They were a motley crew of cranks, crazies and far-right wingnuts. Clearly, the demos were organized by puppets of the Liberal party, then shamelessly plugged by right-wing shock jocks. Really, the fact that they were even allowed to do this is too distressing for words!

That is why even though the numbers were disturbingly large, you shouldn't worry about them at all, fellow travellers. It's just the usual far-right rentacrowd in action.

The pro-carbon tax rallies, on the other hand - well, they have all been completely spontaneous, genuine and representative. Not that it was an actual demo, but there were all those good people in Fremantle who showed up to tell Julia Gillard that they welcomed the carbon tax. Clearly no extremist or political party involvement there. Just a bunch of concerned locals making their feelings known.

And then in Sydney yesterday just near the anti-carbon tax rally, there was one for it. Of course, right-wingers have made much of Getup's involvement in this event. But that is the very definition of a grass roots organization. Their leader Simon Sheik is truly a man of the people, much as Che Guevara was in his time. And he is such a wonderful orator, with a brilliant turn of phrase. Said he, to rousing cheers no doubt:

We are closer than ever to the future that we demand!

That is so true. We hold the fate of the global climate a century hence in our hands now. Now! We are like demigods with a time machine. We just have to jump into it and start the ignition.

And while I am usually loath to endorse war imagery I really like this analogy from Sheikh:

We are the last line of defence for Mother Nature.

Right on. We must not let these coal burning barbarians storm the city gates. Without this carbon tax for Australia, life on Earth is doomed!

Of course conservatives are incapable of appreciating the tax's momentous significance. Take this cynical and negative assessment of both rallies from the appalling Gavin Atkins. The whole piece is quite noxious but there are a couple of segments worth quoting since they reveal the tragic extent of his indoctrination:

One notable thing is that there were far more police at the warmies rally than at the anti-carbon tax rally – I reckon three times as many - including horses and riot police.

Well of course. Even though we have a Labor Government, the left is always more heavily monitored by the authorities. Clearly a hangover from the eeevil, oppressive regime of John HoWARd.

The lefties were also noticeably late to start and hairier, while the anti-tax folk were early and clean shaven. The lefties, it’s true, were younger on average, but there is not a worse looking hippie than an ageing one, and there were plenty of them in the warmie crowd.

Typical goatee-phobic propaganda from a bitter, lookist (and probably balding) old fart.

At the anti-tax rally, Angry Anderson showed he knows how to work crowds, and like Angry, the speakers were not happy, while at the other, one presenter almost started crying on stage.

Well, doesn't that just sum up the difference, hmm? One demo was defined by anger; the other by sorrow over the terrifying plight of the environment. You just couldn't get a better example of how conservatives lack compassion and progressives possess an abundance of it.

The choice is just so clear: Either we listen to caring visionaries and save the planet for future generations by implementing this carbon tax. Or we obey bitter, angry wingnuts and go to our doom as a species, taking all other life on Earth with us!

It's a no-brainer, surely.